I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
