He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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