someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
