what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
