just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
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