just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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