i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
