when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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