we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
my shit smells like andre
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize