remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize