You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize
