He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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