Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
