so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
