so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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