do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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