She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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