sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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