Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
