sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Randomize
