My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Randomize
