honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I have post one night stand depression
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
