Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
