Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize