Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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