You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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