Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
dude. I can hear the air.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
