I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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