So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
