Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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