yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
