Your dad touched me again.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
This baby is an asshole
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
