her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I cut my penus on the lid.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
