we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
you made out with another girl for some wings
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
