just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
