It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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