Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Randomize
