If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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