Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Dick very happy bro
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Randomize
