wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize
