your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
