Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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