I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
