HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
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