1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Watching her eat just hurts me
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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