And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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