i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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