Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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