White coat. Heels.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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