sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
