is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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