Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
