The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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